From A Better Friend Than It Seems Is Desired, (Or, No Offense But F*ck You)

From a Better Friend Than It Seems Is Desired, 
Or, No Offense But F*ck You*

Working Supplemental Titles: "If You Expected Me To Feel Bad At Your Decision To Take Offense, I'm So Sorry '"When You Called To Wish Me A Happy Birthday & Was Told That You Could Call Back To Leave A Message But I Chose Not To Come To 'the Phone At The Time, Perhaps Your Decision To Take Such Offense That You Called Back To Loudly Leave An Angry Message Lecturing Me At Length For Not Being A Good Enough Friend Was Not Shall We Say Incredibly Well Thought Out"